Revisionist Poetry – I knew a God…, v5: A comical version

Before I knew a god there was a river —
a muddled, polite thing that mislaid its oar.
I drifted to its rhythm like a man to free coffee;
the lark tried a solo and hit the wrong note spectacularly.

Before I knew a god there was a star,
a glittering gossip in the sky’s dressing room.
I leaned close, squinting, thinking: bargain bin beauty —
and kept the last page because it matched my umbrella.

Before I knew a god there was a rose,
which smelled, frankly, of confidence and old perfume.
I turned, nostrils heroic; Fate shrugged and said, “Fine, take it.”
I cupped the dew as if answering a small, polite quiz.

Before I knew a god there was a thorn,
which poked like reality checking my pockets.
Migraine arrived with terrible punctuality —
but at the end, life and I shared a wink and a ridiculous hat.