“There is great happiness in not wanting, in not being something, in not going somewhere.” By Krishnamurti
Acceptance. Acceptance and gratitude. Part of me wants to use this saying to justify my procrastinations, but I know they are not connected. I’m not convinced that anyone can start with contentment, because it feels wrapped into accomplishment for me. Maybe this is part of the problem. The other part is I find it hard to console the state of contentment with following dreams. The thought just came to me: “Don’t follow your dreams; live them.”
I’ve heard that somewhere before and it feels like it means that when we immerse ourselves in something, we no longer experience wanting of it, because we are there. Living our dreams requires us to be in them. We no longer chase them, or pursue them, dream them, we are doing, being, and living them. We are in the NOW.
I’m a little uncertain about the “not being something” concept. It occurs to me that perhaps we might be trying to convince ourselves and others of something not entirely true when we use “I Am” statement. Think about the question: “What do you do?” Does whatever you answer start with “I am”? If so, can you really with full honesty say that is all you are? Does it always feel a little false or incomplete? It does for me. It makes me anxious to answer it. I now think it takes me out of alignment with all that I truly am.
I’m now sure I express that anxiety so well, that people don’t ask me the question any more and that also has some negative feelings. I feel that. No one is interested in me. Can you see where this is going? It’s spiralling downward. It feeds itself. Time to make it stop. Time to come back to now!