“You don’t attract wellbeing. It’s continuously flowing. You are either letting it in or resisting.” By Abraham-Hicks
Ok, I accept this, and it feels right. The question remains, why am I resisting it? I’ve been swimming in and out of pools of wellbeing, and the opposite, un-wellbeing for many, many years. I can accept that I’ve build strong habits of resisting, but why and more importantly, how do I change these habits?
The answer keeps coming loud and clear: “replace them for habits of letting it in.” On occasion, I have seen and felt that it can be that simple, but why do I go back to the old habits? What is so damn appealing to me that I prefer feeling miserable? Perhaps because all my pleasures feel like guilty ones. Being it watching TV, reading fantasy books, drawing, having a drink, etc… all have become associated to guilt in some form or other. I’ve come to accept the judgement that these are frivolous and unproductive activities. I can hardly even enjoy them anymore. I’ve been searching for wellbeing for so long, that any productive deviation from it incites the opposite effect of un-wellbeing. Somehow, I’ve forgotten what wellbeing feels like.
Another part of me is saying that I’ve built my own un-wellbeing with a progressive and pervasive habit of procrastination. My inner voice, God bless it, is reminding me that when I have a task to accomplish and I set my deadlines to get it done, I always exceed what needs to be done in some way: time, output, results, creativity. When I do this, I feel content, pleased, happy… well. I feel the answer is right in front of me. Set goals, stay busy, keep completing my goals… be happy.
Perhaps the best way to let in wellbeing is to keep moving with the flow. Keep doing, and getting stuff done and the accomplishments will bring in the wellbeing.