Money Don’t Multiply on Its Own (Revisionist Shakespeare – Sonnet 4 for Gen X)

Why do you keep, you pretty damn spender,
Hoarding your looks and letting them sit there?
Nature gave you a whole lot to render,
But you’re acting like beauty just ain’t fair.

Look at yourself: you’ve got a wild-ass loan
Of grace and charm that was never really yours;
You’re just a middleman, sitting on stolen gold,
Supposed to pass it on before it floors.

If you waste that gift and keep it all to yourself,
You’re being a greedy bastard with borrowed wealth;
Beauty’s not meant to rot up on a shelf,
It’s meant to grow, to be shared, to build more wealth.

So stop acting like time won’t come collect—
Use what you’ve got, or history will f*** you up next.