Today I turned 50 years old. This past week has been filled with blessings, kind words, and good wishes. It has also come with variations of that perennial question: “How does it feel to be a year older?” I’ve never really known how to answer this question. Mostly I stumble over a verbose nonsense explanation amounting to the admission that I just don’t know! For those who know me, “I don’t know” hasn’t always been my best friend and hasn’t always brought out the best of my personality traits. I’ve grown out of that, thank God, wink, wink! These past few years have been special in a very ominous fashion. When asking the question, those well-wishers often finish with: “ You know, 50 is around the corner and coming fast…?” They leave me dangling in their personal dread, like the bloody participle I just left dangling at the end of my sentence. This year is almost no different, except the dangling dread comes with advice, instead of some unsaid warning. Now it comes with a version of “age is just a number…”
All these dangling participles leave me with the conclusion that no one has a clue what age is supposed to mean! So, I asked myself: “What does it mean to be 50?” And… NOTHING! Well, it means something to me, but not some earth shattering revelation. It really is only a number, except the reflection turned me back on where I am in my life and I got filled with gratitude for a great many things.
Who I am today: A Dad, a Husband, a friend, a creative, a learner, and a teacher.
Where I am today: Exactly where I should be.
What I am today: I am what I am.
Why I am this today: I’m successful, regardless of the outcomes, because I spontaneously take leaps of faith.
How I am today: Grateful, Grateful, Grateful!!!
All evasiveness and waxing philosophical aside, gratitude is the predominant feeling of the day. To be more precise, I feel very lucky! I have an amazing Daughter who loves me fills me with love every day. I have an awesome wife, who fills the roles of friend, partner, confidant, teacher, and love of my life! I have friends who accept me for who I am and show me daily how much I’m loved and worth loving. I have the blessing of accepting and pursuing my creative passions, and the universe has rewarded me with the additional creative outlet of writing. (PS: I AM LOVING WRITING!!!) I have entered a period of learning like none I’ve ever experience before and I’m enjoying it more than I could have ever imagined! I’ve always enjoyed sharing my knowledge and now students are coming to me for it. The most amazing blessing is that people I sought out as mentors are also coming to me. This is simply amazing!
So, what has turning 50 meant to me so far? I have a blessed life, and all the trials, struggles, efforts, and mistakes have driven me to where I am today. I am loving where I am today! I am more amazed and excited by possibilities than ever before. I am hopeful and excited about what is around the next corner. As my daughter wrote in my Birthday card, I am the most Positive about the future! It’s all happening at once for me right now and I refuse to get overwhelmed by the abundance of it… Bring it on! I’ll learn how to manage all of it! I’m 50, only getting started, and grateful for the knowledge that every new day will offer the option for this amazing feeling.
Happy Birthday Mr. Work In Progress… and I’d have it no other way! Here I come! Are you ready?
Ps: Feel free to get me one of these in a Medium to Large… I won’t say no.
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